Now, as medical issues go. This one is minor. Very minor. But it was painful, annoying, and expensive, and generally pissed me off.
I arrived at the "Dental Arts" office where they have key lighting, an aquarium, wireless internet, a fountain, piped in symphonies, and cable tv. They have warm cloths for your face, headphones, and other spa-like options. They offer you tea or coffee (doesn't that stain your teeth?) and generally pamper you in the receiving lobby.
BUT IT'S ALL A BIG RUSE! They are just trying to get you all relaxed so you can pour yourself into that extra padded reclining chair and pretend its a lazy-boy and you're settling in for a nice nap before the Chief Torture Master arrives with all her nasty tools.

This really isn't fair. She's a nice lady and I know she is just doing her job, but MOTHER OF GOD is it really necessary for you to lean in and use five different tools in my mouth to get a little tartar out???
Seriously.
At one point, I was pulling back from her and thinking, "live and let live on the tartar babe...really...no need to get out the nukes..." Everytime I winced and whimpered she flatly replied, "sorry"...and kept right on at it.
When she finally gave me a break to rinse I was exhausted. Then she says (sweetly), "You may have a little tenderness in that one area today."
UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE YEAR.
So, is this post the most boring, most whining, most overstated misery post you ever read? I mean many of you have probably had root canals, major surgery (dental or otherwise), suffered disease, painful treatments, etc. and here I am complaining about a few metal tools digging out a little tartar in my mouth.
But such is my world. Made up of small dramas and equally small moments of joys. Little blips on the radar of life.
9 comments:
I'm with you, I hate the dentist.
I used to love it, but now, I really hate it. Your justified. :)
If that's a pic of your hygentist's try, I think I'd be finding another. :)
I meant hygentist's tray.
I really meant "hygenist's." Is it Monday?
Yeah, I don't think I'd be going there either if those are the tools they used. Is that a bottle of novocaine??
Great post -- I'm not a lover of going to the dentist, either. Ick.
What the hell kind of dentist are you going to anyway?
I'm with you on this one... I'd take a root canal over a cleaning ANY DAY. Seriously.
I wrote a similar post awhile back called "Medieval Torture - My Trip to the Dentist." I have to agree with you wholeheartedly on the whole thing. And what's with how happy those people are? I seriously think it's just because they get to take out all of their frustrations on us.
Post a Comment