Wednesday, March 10, 2010

When to De-Friend

Hubby is a Facebook fan.  Me?  Not so much.  I tried it out...twice...and both times in a fit of disgust I deleted my profile and disappeared.  He has his tied to his blog and is totally interconnected.  Me? I disliked the real name profile and the crazy fan sites and the other virtual snowball type things.  And the status updates?  Ugh....I really don't care if you just picked your nose.

But Hubby just told me he finally crossed the threshold of "de-friending".  Up until now, anyone who came out of the woodwork he accepted them back with open arms.  Even the haters from high school.  The bullies.  The popular set that had no time for the likes of us back then.  The drama-ramas that make your eyes roll.  The stoners, the loners, the jocks, the nobody's...all were equalized if they were class of 1984 of his high school.

Many of these people he treated with kid gloves...not getting too close...no private wall conversations...no comments on strange status updates or posts.

But this weekend, he hit the de-friend button.

What pushed my mild-mannered loving democratic husband to the edge and over it?

Someone on his friend list joined a fan club.  I hesitate to even use the real name lest some google search engine link me to this disgusting group.  Let me try and use euphemisms...sorry there are none.  The fan club was "I wipe my ass with the K*ran".


If you came here responding to that phrase let me disclaim:
Neither Hubby nor I want anything to do with this disgusting and repulsive group.

When Hubby told me that this fan club even existed I nearly vomited.  The fact that someone that had been on his friend list joined it made us rage.  We have a copy of the Koran on our bookshelf.  We also have several versions of the Bible, a book on the Life of Mohammed, and books on the history of Judaism.  We are not religious, and I even question the existence of God on a daily basis, but Hubby has faith....true, deep and abiding faith in some higher being. And he also has a healthy curiosity about the origins of faith, the structure of religions, and the strong soul-deep beliefs that cause people to fight wars on one side and preach peace on the other. Regardless of our own personal feelings we could never imagine denigrating anyone else's beliefs in such a way as this group.

Ok, I'll admit, I have sometimes made plain my complaints about organized religion.  And the Catholic Church makes me kind of nutso sometimes.  But not the people so much as the rhetoric.  Regardless, if I EVER made anyone feel as upset and sick as the idea of this fan club felt to me, I truly and humbly apologize.  My soapbox should be burned on my own front lawn like a burning cross.

But before we get to that little home made conflagration, let's set a little fire over at Facebook.   I'd like to see Facebook take a moment to take responsibility for this incredibly repulsive use of their site.  How can they allow their subscribers to even create such a repulsive community link?

I didn't think I could be any more disappointed in Facebook than I was on my last try at it.  I was so wrong.

4 comments:

A Slice of My Life said...

Wow...I can't even imagine someone being so fill with hate to come up with a group like that. Just...wow.

I'm very limiting to who I add as a friend. Feelings might get a little bent out of shape, but if we aren't really friends/relatives (and I happen to like all my relatives) then I just hit ignore.

The most shocking thing I've ever seen was when someone joined a Sarah Palin support group. My jaw dropped in amazement...but I wasn't offended.

I hope someone flags that other group and gets it banned by FB because that is just wrong on every single level.

Chelle said...

This morning on the Today show there was a story on what was dubbed a "Facebook Murder" some poor child was friended by a deviant and subsequently assaulted and killed. Facebook can definitely be abused by crazies!

Sue said...

I agree with what you about the hate group. It should be flagged and gotten rid of, and hopefully it was.

I like Facebook, so I'll play Devil's advocate ... To me, Facebook itself is the medium, not the message. In my opinion, it's not much different from blogging. It can be used for good or bad.

I use it to keep in touch, just like with my blog. It got so popular - way more than my blog! - that I keep in touch with a lot more people. I'm careful about what I write. I know that many people are reading. I make friends with people and take off people when it seems appropriate.

I like that it keeps me aware of what my kids are up to. My entire family is on it, including my cousins, parents, aunts and uncles. I haven't made friends with many of the people from High School, unless I liked them back then. I've gotten friendlier with a lot of co-workers because of it, too.

It's a time waster. That's a definite negative. But it's like sitting around chatting, sometimes you just waste time, and it's OK.

I tend to have very liberal opinions. I try to keep them to myself, because I know plenty of people dislike me for them. Some people just don't exercise that restraint. That's a good person to unfriend.

It's not for everyone, for sure... but I like it :) (I just don't like the haters!)

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

There are some real sickos out there. When Chelsea King was murdered last week, someone started an "I bet a pickle can get more fans than Chelsea King" page.

FB finally took action.